• The dear old granny who lives in a creepy old house and likes to give candy to young children is almost always a monster.
• What ever it is. Its always behind you
• Even the most "un-scary" moment in a film can be made scary with the right sound.
• Almost all girls in horror films go into the basement or run outside into the dark
• Caller ID doesn't seem to work in tracing nuisance callers in horror films.
• The lights will always go out when you are about to be stabbed
• The weapon of choice for most psychos is a knife
• Cell phones never seem to have enough battery time when you need to make an emergency call
• If your cat, ferret, dog or hamster acts weirdly, there is a demon, ghost, killer or monster in your house.
• If you killed one of the monsters there is always another one.
• The monster or alien always leaves eggs behind for the sequel
• When you look up its always too late. That's when the monster jumps down on you.
• When staying at a remote farm house never ever offer to go for help, you will die..
• Make sure the home you are interested in buying has not been built on ancient Indian burial ground (or get them to drop the price)
• If you are lost in the woods and someone is after you never split up, you will die
• If you heard a strange sound outside its probably the wild wielding axe murderer, do not investigate.

If you have anymore to add please let me know! :)